Desires of the Heart(h)

“Begin with the end in mind.”
Stephen R. Covey, 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

This second habit starts with something seemingly ominous, focusing on the end of things. As one who’s put too much stock in an unpredictable, undetermined future, I initially shrugged off this principle. In returning to it a second time, with different eyes and ears open, I gleaned a whole new meaning.

I thought of the phoenix, whose end is its beginning. I thought of the past burnt away and the ashes of that past enriching a bountiful future. And then I thought of Jean Grey, one of my favorite childhood superheroes.


She’s got her own complicated, convoluted death and rebirth. She becomes the bearer of the Phoenix Force after dying once. She comes back with a (literal) vengeance–sometimes as a savior and other times a destroyer. Either way, she comes back powerful and capable of changing the multiverse. It’s no surprise she made such an impact on me in my youth.

Then I got to thinking of Covey’s idea of defining success by beginning with the end, and I realized how my desires are shaped. With the second habit, he asks you to imagine how attendees of your funeral would remember you. The way my brain works, I thought of what I wanted done with my remains. I realized cremation was in the cards for me, and then I remembered some weird things people do with cremains. Of course, I’m fine with basic interment, but these were too related not to share.

  • For those who feel like diamonds are forever,
  • Or want to remember their loved ones’ favorite song,
  • Or simply are eco-friendly.

I was this close to actually posting how I wanted my friends and family to remember me, but I feel like that might be a bit too personal/egotistical for my comfort zone. So, if you really want to know, ask me on your own!

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